Thursday, August 11, 2016

Loving Yourself

It's been a minute and I wanted to see what others thought about this subject

Loving yourself?

Seems like common sense but I find that when you get caught up with work, taking care of the family, and others sometimes the last person you take care of is yourself.

When my Mother was living in her final years I was able to see her at any time because I was self employed. We would go shopping, out to eat, and just be around each other. When she died I felt lost because who was I going to take care of.

It was in the months following her death that there were women in the church who called to check on me, take me to lunch and even the spa.

It was during this time that I needed to be nurtured.  I was loved on to the point that I broke through and loved myself.

This year makes ten years of my Mother's passing and I find myself feeling lost

Though I have many accomplishments under my belt there was something missing

Recently I was faced with adversity and my self esteem felt shattered

The mask was put on so that others couldn't see my pain

Tears were becoming part of the norm

My body was reacting with new aches and pains

My spirit was thirsty for something more

I found myself at the cross roads again

In the back of my mind I was taking abuse from others and the blows were numbing

No hands were ever put on me. It was words, it was treatment, and it was repeated

If you love me you wouldn't treat me this way?

Reality set in that the only person who can love me better was myself

I had to start over again

I had to let the toxic go and be free

I had to say and believe it that I loved myself

I had to take care of myself first

I had to reached out my hand and there was love on the other side

The burden has been lifted

The weight is gone

God was there with a gentle reminder

That he loved me more

By Patricia A. Saunders
Author of This Too Shall Pass

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