Closing the door
So I have been going back and forth with my feelings on this subject. I am a African American Woman
that was born in a small town in Connecticut. Prominently the population was Caucasian, African
American, Puerto Rican and Indian. I grew up in a middle class neighborhood where I was beat up daily
by 3 little white boys from the time I was able to go outside to play solo until I was jumped on my front
porch and my mother told me it was okay to fight back .
We moved to an exclusive neighborhood where we were the only Blacks and some neighbors didn't take
to kind to their new neighbors. This neighborhood was where doctors, lawyers and other business owners
lived. My mother later shared that the house we had brought was directly across the street from where she
was once a maid for the owners. Two doors down from us was a man who didn't like Blacks and had
a black dog trained to attack Blacks. So picture a eight year old little girl was walking home from school
to be chased by this savage dog weekly . My father would getting off of work and would be driving down
the tree lined street to find his daughter perched in a tree, crying and waiting to be rescued. I started to be
driven to and from school and that big savage dog I heard died from eating some poison.
With those experiences I still had friends of all races that I talked to on the phone, played with, spent the
night over their houses and there wasn't race that separated us. We were young and innocent trying
to figure out our places in the place called life.
As I went into my teen years I loved to go shopping and noticed something strange when I entered into a
store I was followed by the staff. I would pick up an item and the assumption was that I couldn't afford it.
This still goes on today and I am a grown woman who can afford anything I walk into a store for. I have
had an open seat for someone to sit next to me on a bus and they refused. At a young age I didn't
understand it until my parents explained what prejudice is, people who want to discriminate because
you're African American, and they also had to explain some will want to harm me.
So my circle was always those who loved me, who didn't see color and we could all cohabitate together. I
went to a HBCU and later transferred to a top ranked research educational institution in Connecticut.
Again, diversed community of students and faculty staff on campus and we would go into our pods. The
athletes, the sororities, fraternities and the rest of us. I hung out at the African American Cultural Center
but it wasn't frown upon if someone wanted to hang out that wasn't Black.
I have had various jobs after graduating college, working in various industries and still I have had very
little incidents where I had to go to Human Resources because of a racial comment or treatment. Not to
say that it didn't exist I never had the experience of it happening until 2010, I had one manager from
Kentucky. The office that I was transferred to in a urban city was majority African American , some
Asian, and some Mexican employees. He had set up his office and placed a Confederate flag, books, and
other paraphernalia that l alerted my executive administrative assistant, and she put me in touch with the
Regional Manager. The materials were taken down and we had to work on building a work relationship
because I was his direct report. For two years we were able to work together and there wasn't any
problems.
So fast forward to the climate we are in right now where we have a leader of our nation inciting hate.
Where we have innocent people of color being killed and not consequence for those that pulled the
trigger. Where we are seeing on the news and social media another African American male or female
is shot. Where we see a Latina officer serving our country killed. Where we feel like a target is on our
backs even when we are in the comforts of our home. I have tossed and turned because in all the
years of my life I can't hide from it when I see it right there . I can't help when I have a conversation
with a childhood friend who is Caucasian and everything that is reported she refutes that it happened.
When she talks with such hatred against immigrants I can't believe what I am hearing because
her family came from Italy. When I hear her talk about the protests and she says (They) protested, they
blocked the local highway, and how disgusted she is . I know for a fact that the younger generation
isn't afraid to protest, are angry because of the injustice, and want to be heard. I know that those who
protested were also nieces, nephews and other family members joining into the protests. So I am
thinking (They) are African Americans. ( They) are my family members. (They) is ME! I had a former
coworker meet for lunch and she was telling me about her job and her racist boss. She made the
comment I wonder what he would think if he knew I was having lunch with two Black women.
I have never generalized my friends . I have never separated them by race. My mother was an
ordained minister that fed the homeless or anyone that was hungry. I am used to coming home
and someone who I didn't know would be sitting next to me eating , getting food to take with them, and
clothes. I don't live with blinders on thinking that the world is perfect but I am seeing people who
I felt were friends true colors. I appreciate the allies that understand and don't pretend to know
what is to walk in an African American's shoes but they can empathize.
This past week we saw a protest that looked very different from the Black Lives Matter protest. There
wasn't a lot of arrests. There were doors opened, photoshoots with those committing a crime, and
there were people that helped on all levels. When those who saw this violent act incited by a leader that
didn't want to accept that he lost a race , we were in shock , angered , and were vocal on our platforms in
blogs, social media, essays, interviews there were those who waited to pounce. Jumping in our comments
to defend the actions of those from #45.
That's when I had to come to reality with the one person that I had known since middle school that this
is real in your face . This is where we have to go our separate ways because she will never understand
the treatment of people of color, that she will think that everything that is wrong with the country is our
fault, and that she is racist against people who are immigrant and must have forgotten that she is a legacy
of a immigrant. With all the anger she has bottled up inside of her I have to close
the door.
Our nation has to heal. There has to be a rebuilding of our government. We are not invisible.
As Martin Luther King Jr Day is approaching and a new administration will be sworn in two days after
that I will end with this "This will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with new meaning “My country ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my father’s died, land of the Pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring!”
And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true. So let freedom ring from the hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York."
As the saying goes you have to close the door to be open to new beginnings.
Blessings,
Patricia A. Saunders
Author, Blogger, Motivational Speaker
Self Published Author, Patricia A. Saunders was born and raised in Connecticut before relocating to the San Francisco Bay Area nearly 26 years ago. She received her Master's in Management from the University of Phoenix in 2011. After the passing of her mother who had Alzheimer's, Patricia decided if she inherited the disease she wanted her words to be her legacy and that all the words that she kept to herself were to be released.
Her work has been featured on a Coast to Coast Book Tour at the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books, Toronto Word On The Street, Sacramento Black Book Fair, Tucson Book Festival, Miami International Festival of Books and AARP Life@50+ Spring Convention. Recently she was chosen among 100 authors from around the United States to participate in the Author's Pavilion at the 2018 Congressional Black Caucus Convention in Washington, DC.
She is a monthly blogger of her own blog Blessed & Curvy who covers today's hot topics. Also she is certified speaker with the Professional Woman Network for Women's Issues & Diversity.
Reference:
https://www.cnn.com/2021/01/09/media/reliable-sources-january-8/index.html
Comments
Post a Comment